In a split second
by LordOfTheMarshland
Summary: Perspective flip. Takano's life turned upside down in a blink of an eye.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Because we're almost never shown Takano's POV in the story, I like to imagine how he might think or feel. Want to do a proper perspective flip but am too lazy so I start with the key moment when the plot kicked into gear. I dislike the way Takano forced himself on Onodera in ep.3 but when I realize what a messed up situation he was in, I cannot be really angry at him.

In a split second 

Masamune Takano distractedly listened to the random chatter of his subordinates. It sure felt nice to have a relaxing working day even if another hellish time was waiting for them just around the corner. The newcomer with zero experience with manga would be a problem though. At least the guy seemed to be hardworker. Going through their whole manga collection? Not bad for someone who was so annoyed at being assigned to Emerald the day before.

Everything was fine and dandy until Onodera said "Oh, I used to read all the books in the library in high school. It was like a hobby."

Masamune froze.

All of the vague and fragmented pieces of his memory sorted themselves out and fitted together into a complete picture. The person he was trying to recall finally emerged. A junior who confessed to him out of nowhere in the library of his highschool. The boy whose presence he had always felt before that sudden confession. The boy who always blushed when being around him. Ritsu...

Seriously?

He had to look, really look at Onodera. Could that shy delicate schoolboy grow into this impertinent frowning guy? The two of them indeed looked similar but the way they behaved was a different story altogether. The adorably sweet boy he knew would never have snapped back against a superior the way this guy did. So far Onodera had always kept a polite front but in truth he looked as if he would have bitten someone in any minute.

He had gazed either too long or too intensely because Onodera looked up with a puzzled look and asked "What's wrong?" That question shook Masamune from his thoughts. He instinctively replied "Nothing", taking his gaze off Onodera but still discreetly observing the guy from the corner of his eyes. As he half expected, Onodera scowled and returned to the manga catalogue.

Not until then had Masamune realized that his heart had been racing like mad. Just now when Onodera looked up at him without any trace of dissatisfaction or defiance the guy had been wearing from the day before, the newcomer was indeed Ritsu. His Ritsu. How could he not recognize his highschool boyfriend earlier? He __knew__ he had met the newcomer somewhere. And that first name. Ritsu. Ritsu.

The first time after who knows how long in his adult life, Masamune felt dizzy when a swarm of questions flooded his mind. How, how on earth did his ex end up here in the very department he supervised? Why now of all time? A faint ache arose on his head where he had been kicked on that fateful day as well as in his heart. Why did Ritsu deny knowing him after what they had been through? Did he really forget? Was it really just a game to him?

Masamune's rational and composed side berated him for getting worked up so easily. He was no longer that naive youth who was easily rattled by every up and down in his life. So what if the ex-boyfriend who had dumped him re-appeared? The guy did not even remember him or want to admit knowing him. What was the use of bringing up their highschool relationship then? Teenage love seldom last anyway. That guy had moved on and so had he.

Masamune's hand tightened into a fist. No, he could not let this slide. He did not even know why they had broken up. He wanted an explanation and an apology. No decent human being would just suddenly break up with his partner and disappeared like that.

Then maybe, maybe they could pick up where they had left and continue their relationship, a part of him which probably remained from his teenage self wistfully added. He mentally snorted. Who would want such an uncute guy like Onodera? Yes, Onodera, not Ritsu. The boy he loved was no more. That thought made him strangely sad. He too was not the Masamune back then. They had changed. Both of them.

Anyway, the confrontation would have to wait. They were no longer carefree highschool students. There was work and Masamune would not want anything to screw up the precarious cycle he and the team had worked so hard to build and maintain. He had to break Onodera for the duties here first. He would kill the guy if he proved to be a failure, ex-boyfriend or not. A bit more time to think carefully about how he should treat Onodera would not hurt either. For now, let them be simply editor-in-chief and subordinate. That would make his life easier.

Still, Masamune could not help but be moved on the way home when he saw an earnest Onodera reading through a pile of books to get how stories in shoujo manga worked. That was his Ritsu. The honest Ritsu who tried so hard at everything he did.

Masamune sighed and shook his head. Life. Hated. Him.

END


	2. Chapter 2

Summary: Continuation of sort to "In a split second". Takano's torments began.

Precarious balance

Ever since Masamune started working he had developed a habit of making plans for everything. Not necessarily very detailed plans, but enough for him not to lose orientation in his hectic life. Knowing what to do next always made him feel good. There had been a period in his life when he just drifted aimlessly from day to day not knowing or caring who himself was, and he swore he would never freefall like that again.

Dealing with Onodera was no exception to his rigorous planning. Right after getting a general idea about what the newcomer was like, Masamune had quickly drafted in his head a list of what the guy needed to learn, which tasks could be entrusted to him right away and which should come later, what problems could arise and how to solve them, etc, etc.

Oh, the issue of his and Onodera's highschool fling? That could wait until the next cycle or the one after the next. The current full schedule had no place for personal matter. It was never good to mix business with private life. He was editor-in-chief, Onodera was completely new to manga editing. Masamune needed to have a calm heart and clear mind to gauge how well the guy performed in his team and make the necessary decision. Besides, it was something from ten years ago. He and Onodera had gone seperate ways far, far apart from each other. Confronting the guy would simply bring their highschool affair to a proper closure, a final shovel of soil to the grave of something long dead.

Or so Masamune's plan was.

But if there was something he should have known from his profession, it was that deadlines existed to be missed and plans were made to be derailed.

For one thing, it was a surreal experience interacting with his ex-boyfriend when the guy did not realize who he was. Earlier he had suspected that Onodera had pretended not knowing him, but working with the guy everyday made him think otherwise. Onodera was painfully easy to read and all Masamune could get from him was complete obliviousness. It was better this way. Yes, it made life simpler. All Masamune had to do was to ignore he had ever known the guy. Nevertheless, Masamune still instinctively felt awkward facing his ex day after day and it was just plain unfair that he alone had to suffer.

Besides, a part of Masamune had come to vaguely expect that Onodera would recognize him any time. Slowly but surely he could feel a subtle tension building as if he had been holding a secret. How should he react when that moment came? How would he feel? How should he face Onodera from then on? Once or twice he came dangerously to explosion._Why didn't Onodera recognize him already?_That guy had stalked him in years before confessing to him on his own accord, for crying out loud!

Masamune had to curse himself. Why couldn't he just turn around and walk away from this mess? Why couldn't he stand it when Onodera looked at him as if he were a complete stranger?

Masamune sighed. He had been sighing a lot lately.

As editor-in-chief, Masamune was grateful that Onodera integrated to the new workplace quite easily. After he dropped the dissatisfied cantankerous attitude, the guy proved to be a friendly and dedicated worker, not exceptionally talented but apt and eager to learn. The team liked him and he had become something of a little brother in the department. However, as office life went, there had to be one person Onodera always fought with and that person was none other than Masamune.

No, he definitely did not pick on Onodera. He was just doing his job as a superior and a mentor. Besides, Onodera asked for it. Why couldn't he be sweet and obedient like when Tori, Mino or Kisa, in short everyone else, were teaching him? Whenever Onodera snapped back at him, the place where he had been kicked ached slightly as if reminding him that in front of him was the bastard who attacked and then dumped him without reason.

But Masamune never sensed any malice from the guy. It was hard to believe that he could ever wilfully hurt anybody. Onodera was just that naive and easy to provoke. Masamune had to chuckle when he recalled the scowling face. It was comical. And _cute_. Would his Ritsu have made those expressions? That thought brought a pang in his heart. The period they were together was too short and now ten years had passed. Those years had been rough but in the end rewarding to Masamune. How had that time been for Ritsu?

He had been such a sweet boy to Masamune ten years ago. He could be considered sweet now, except when Masamune was around. How much had he actually changed?

Why could he still make Masamune's heart beat a little faster with every change in his expressions?

If there was one thing Masamune had learnt from his profession, it was that quick action was crucial when his plans went awry. The incident with that mangaka for example. Right when it was clear that the manuscript could not be done on time, Masamune had to immediately re-negotiate the deadline with the printing agency and go check on her progress as well as do the phototypesetting right there.

So when Onodera suddenly poured out his admiration and concern for the mangaka not unlike the way Ritsu confessed to Masamune a long time ago, when he blushed while confiding in Masamune his problem during their little heart-to-heart at dawn afterwards, Masamune knew he could not delay the inevitable any longer.

He wanted Ritsu to recognize him properly so that he could rightfully win back the love he had lost. Once and for all.

His plans would need serious revisions.

END


	3. Chapter 3

****A/N:**** Another perspective flip piece. I just discovered that burying Takano under truckloads of angst could be quite cathartic.

Roller coaster

"What the hell is going on?" Yokozawa did not waste a second to start the interrogation as soon as the two of them were alone.

That was something Masamune would like to know himself. Everything happened so fast. As soon as the mad rush of passions was over, he felt tired. Empty. Lost. A denial that nothing had happened instinctively rose on his lips but he stopped, knowing that his friend would not buy it anyway. Besides, he had had enough with lies tonight.

But the truth was unbearable.

He felt Yokozawa's worried gaze fixed on him. He heard the sound of a bag full of cans being put down, of footsteps heading towards him. He raised his hand on time to stop Yokozawa from checking his temperature. Masamune hated himself to be this pathetic. Summoning all his will to see his friend eye-to-eye, he said "I'm fine".

"Then what with that face?" Yokozawa's voice softened a little. "You've just worked with Onodera, right? Did he do something?"

"No!" Masamune burst out. The question reminded him of how... bad the situation between Ritsu and him could look. The last thing he wanted was Yokozawa came to the wrong conclusion and went after Ritsu. He knew too well what a mama bear his friend could be to those the guy cared about. "It was not his fault! It was..." He faltered and averted his eyes. What had happened was not something he would feel good to say about himself.

He could sense that Yokozawa's eyes narrowed in suspicion. If he did not tell the truth soon, it would just get worse. He took a deep breath to regain his courage. Yokozawa never hid his contempt for lack of temperance and self-control.

"I found out that we used to date in highschool. I... I was out of my mind for a moment and..." Masamune flinched when his friend's face darkened. "Anyway, Onodera did not do anything. It's all my fault, so leave him alone!"

"How about you? Are you really OK?" Yokozawa's expression did not change but Masamune was relieved to see that at least his friend did not pursue the matter with Ritsu further.

"Well, yeah, I'm fine. Look, it's nearly 3am, why don't you go home already?" Now that the misunderstanding was taken care of, Masamune just wanted Yokozawa to go away. He was dying to mend what he had broken earlier. How, he did not know, but there was no way he could not do it in the presence of a third person.

Yokozawa, on the other hand, stubbornly disregarded Masamune's request to be alone as usual. "Don't kid me. You aren't fine at all. If you want, I'll stay over tonight."

Masamune felt his temper rising. His friend could be such an annoying mother hen sometimes! Normally he would chuckle at the thought and make a joke to tick his friend off. Tonight however, he just pushed Yokozawa towards the door. "Enough! I said I'm fine! I'm not a kid anymore! Now just go!". The surprised and then hurt expression on Yokozawa's face told him he had crossed the line somewhere but he was too impatient to stop. After all, it was not like tonight had not already been messed up.

Masamune collapsed right on the doorway as soon as his friend was gone. With the second emotional outburst over, the tiredness returned. What was going on? First Ritsu, then Yokozawa, it seemed that he could do nothing right tonight. Gathering all his will and wits to figure out what could be a solution, he recalled that earlier he had told Ritsu he would call. His hand reached for the cellphone in the pocket but then stopped midway.

How should he face Ritsu? What should he say? What would Ritsu say to him? Which hateful words would be directed at him? Or worse, would he have to hear the tears in the voice of the one he loved? He was terrified to face the consequences. It had been a while since he lashed out with all his might that way and he no longer had that me-against-the-world rebellious attitude to back him up.

But it was no use sitting here agonizing but doing nothing. Masamune decisively picked up the cellphone and dialed Ritsu's number, his mouth getting drier and stomach clenching tighter with each round of dialing tone...

The moment he dreaded never came.

After ten minutes of repeated calling to no avail, he knew he was definitely going to be ignored. Ritsu did not want to have anything to do with him anymore. The younger man did not even care enough to hear his apology. Silence was more powerful a rejection than any loud angry word.

It __hurt.__

For a moment, Masamune thought of knocking on Ritsu's door but he dared not. His call being ignored was a flaring sign that he was unwelcome. He was too tired anyway and he knew he would not be able to get his courage up yet another time tonight.

Giving in to the demands of his exhausted body, Masamune flopped down on the bed and curled up like a child. Alone in the quiet darkness, he felt the cut of what he had done more acutely than ever. Regret. Contempt for his own lack of self-control.

And loneliness. Unbearable loneliness. He was used to being alone. He had friends and colleagues but he was always by himself at home. His territory belonged to him and him alone. He always liked that but Ritsu's presence here had stirred up desires he was not even aware he had.

Not that his wishes would ever come true after tonight. What had he done? His mind unwillingly flashed back the moment when he let his instinctive drives take over. When had his love turned into anger? The desperate need to get the stubborn Ritsu to admit the love for him turned into a spiteful wrestle for dominance?

Being in love again was scary. He was made to see how ugly he could be. Yet at the same time he could not suppress his feelings for Ritsu. His highschool love. His lost treasure. The missing part of his life that he had not known about until he tasted that sweetness again.

What had he done?

Masamune buried his face in the pillow. Enough. Now he just wanted to sleep.

The following days passed by in a daze where only experience and his conscience could help Masamune function as usual. He did not see Ritsu eye-to-eye and the latter did not once look at him. They were never alone with each other. Their communication was out of utmost professional necessity and was as terse as possible. Everyone else in the team seemed to pick up on the tension as Masamune could feel sideway glances directed at him. Yokozawa too once or twice tried to talk to him but he wilfully ignored his friend. He knew he should not let this situation last any longer but he was afraid another confrontation with Ritsu would just upset the balance further, something he could not afford since they were heading into the critical period of the cycle. He would straighten things out with his ex-boyfriend after the busy time over.

That might or might not have something to do with his stubborn wish to delay the ultimate rejection from Ritsu, to pretend that he had not messed up his chance. But he did not want to think too deep into that.

It was just his accursed luck that there must be a catch somewhere in his mutual avoidance with Ritsu and things must go downhill despite his best intentions. Chaos ensued when Mutou, the featured mangaka of the month, could not deliver the manuscripts on time. Kisa freaked out. Yokozawa immediately arrived to demand an explanation. He must have shouted once or twice, not that he would remember. And Ritsu...

"Please give me half a day! I'll go to Hokkaido right now. I'll be back at 9. I'll negotiate with the printer myself!"

What a naive solution that only a newcomer would come up! Determination was welcome but unfounded enthusiasm was not. Nothing could be done now except to drop the author. Masamune could sympathize with Ritsu's mindset as he too once thought the same way but the decision needed to be made quickly. Even if he had not realized that himself, Yokozawa's presence here reminded him about his responsibilities.

But then Ritsu threw down his gauntlet, so to speak, and vowed to bring the manuscript back. The whole office was confounded by that reckless declaration.

Masamune kept his silence amidst the circus. The plan was too risky and depended on so many things they could not control, but it could succeed. The probability was very small but it was there. If it was really Fate's intention to screw Masamune up completely in this cycle, the manuscript would not arrive on time. The work of the whole team would be affected. He would fail as editor-in-chief. His career would be at risk.

And if Fate wanted to screw him up, he would never have Ritsu back no matter what he tried.

But it was Ritsu. Masamune knew from experience that his ex-boyfriend would do anything to stay true to his words. Also it was probably just his wild and biased hope but Ritsu would never harm him.

So indeed, why not take the gamble? His rational side was screaming at him but his instinct told him it would turn out OK. Somehow it felt fair to through the manuscript let Ritsu decide what would happen to him.

The department alternated between gloom and panic while Yokozawa voiced his dissatisfaction but Masamune felt strangely calm. How he could be so, he did not know. It was either the confidence of someone who had the best cards or the certainty of a prisoner on the way to the scaffold. He was prepared to take whatever this wild solution brought.

He suddenly realized he got part of what he had been wishing for after that night. Ritsu had looked at him again.

Looked like Fate did not want to screw Masamune up that much after all. The manuscript arrived in the nick of time and with lots of apologies to the people involved, their magazine's issue of that month finally got printed. The icing on the cake was that Ritsu and he finally had a talk without wariness and tension. Not that he would do something so insane anytime soon but Masamune grudgingly had some gratitude for the mess because in a twisted way, it had bridged him to his ex. What bonded them was still only work but at least they took the subway home together without fuss.

Masamune's heart skipped a beat when Ritsu's sleepy head fell on his shoulder. He let out a sigh. It could not be helped. The younger man had just been through a hard day.

Why could this simple gesture get his hope back so fast? What was his current stand with Ritsu? How would things go after today?

But it sure felt nice to be on a quiet near-empty subway car after a long day at work with the person he loved sleeping beside him, entrusting everything to him. It would turn out alright, he thought.

END


End file.
